The Right To Say No

No is a powerful word

When I learned from my mentor, Michael Semon, that I had the right to say no to requests from others, my life began to change and I began to grow personally in a new area of assertiveness. Understanding that I could say no when I needed to and without explanation or even feeling guilt, was such a feeling of freedom. It was like letting go of the baggage I carried around everyday.

If you need to say no to a request from another person and you find it impossible, ask yourself what prevents you from doing so. Usually the answer to that question is a feeling of guilt. Maybe it’s an issue of approval from the other person, or maybe you just don’t want to offend them or hurt their feelings. After all, when someone tells you no, it may feel like rejection. Ouch! Get over it. It’s not about you.

When I started practicing assertively saying no, it helped my sales conversion rate because I was not afraid to hear others say no to me. Frequently a person who tells you that they want to think it over is just simply attempting to avoid saying no. It’s a passive aggressive act that manipulates a lot of salespeople. Do you know the feeling? What they really wanted to say was “no thank you,” but they couldn’t.

Do prospects really have the right to take time and think before they decide yes or no to your solution? You bet they do. I know I do. Many sales techniques attempt to take away the prospect’s right to say no, which is in-your-face aggression. You won’t build long-term client relationships by not respecting others boundaries.

So, how do you respond to a think-it-over? Open up room for them to say no. Help them feel comfortable saying no. If they won’t say no, it’s a good possibility that they are not avoiding it and it might make since to ask them what prevents them from saying yes. This process has led me to sincerely help people make the best choice for themselves. And, yes, many people have told me no and I appreciated them for doing do.

What’s the bottom line? Get practice saying no when you need to, so you can feel comfortable hearing no. It’s all about you, not them. You have to become more than you are to change the behavior.