We’re all familiar with sarcasm. It’s a seemingly innocent way of poking fun at a friend or loved one by using irony to convey contempt. We’ve all done it and I am guilty too. But don’t be deceived, sarcasm cuts emotional flesh and hurts the relationship.

Sarcasm is always an aggressive act, even if it’s not meant to be. It’s judgement poisoned by anger. It’s an underhanded way of telling someone something that you’re not willing to say in an upfront, honest and loving way.

The workplace can be the proverbial “war zone,” where the weapons are words. Are the words spoken out of your mouth building others up or are they cutting them down? Avoid sarcasm with employees, prospects, customers or clients. It’s risky. The emotional pain they feel can poison the relationship over time.

There’s a time and a season for everything. There’s a time to confront and there’s a time to hold your tongue. When you confront others, do it in a loving manner, always leaving them with their self-respect. Admonish others with wisdom.

The good king has courage and always carries around a sword in full view, prepared to use it if needed, but never has to. The bad king hides his dagger in his cloak and cuts people down when they are not looking. The bad king has no courage. It takes courage to assert oneself with open and honest communication. But it builds better, healthier relationships.

Inna, my wife, and I strive to make our home a NO SARCASM ZONE. I wish I had learned this lesson sooner. My businesses would have been a no sarcasm zone too.

But no regrets, I am still a work in progress.

Proverbs 12:18  “Reckless words are like a sword but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”

Proverbs 11:12  “A man who lacks judgement derides his neighbor but a man of understanding holds his tongue.”

About the author, Roger Daviston

Roger Daviston is a personal growth consultant who gets measurable results. He facilitates and encourages individuals to change behavior and make different choices to achieve better outcomes.

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