The Three P’s of life:
Promise precedes problems
Problems precede provision
Provision precedes perseverance
Dreams, visions, desires, goals, what ever you want to call them are delusional UNTIL you schedule the activities necessary to get them on a calendar and then go perform them. Once you start doing them, don’t be shocked if you fail. This follows the doing just like spring follows winter.
Think about the failure simply as feedback and do something different or try again. This is called LEARNING. Don’t allow this type of learning to affect your self esteem. Simply make some adjustments like a cruise missile and keep the dream in view.
After this process of perseverance, things outside of yourself will begin to happen to propel you forward. Like a new relationship with a mentor who can guide you. Someone with the power and influence to open a door that you could not open. Be patient with the interruptions in your day. Many times it is God knocking on your door with a resource he wants to give you or a test he wants you to pass. Recognizing the adversity as a test is the key.
Let me illustrate this with an example from my own life. Humility is a strange concept to the proud. Duh! There came a day in my life where I could humble myself or I could be proud and resentful of my perceived victimization.
Allow me to give you some history of events leading up to this day of testing for myself. One day out of nowhere I got a call from a manager at Honeywell who liked my website. He invited me to come visit him at his office in the New York City area. We met and he invited me to speak at an event for his clients, one of which was ConEdison. I met many prospects at this event and some of them hired me. Over the years I did several of these talks and met a person with National Grid (another utility company) and the executive administrator of The New York Plumbers Council.
National Grid and The New York Plumbers Council organized a trade show in New York City and my contact person at ConEd wanted me to be a speaker. She called me and I sent everyone my outline expecting to be confirmed as a speaker, but I was turned down by the decision makers.
I was disappointed and angry because I felt entitled. The lesson that I had not learned yet was something I learned later. I don’t deserve anything from anyone and I don’t owe anyone anything. I can choose to receive freely and give freely but receiving based on fairness leads me to resentment when I perceive fairness has been violated. I learned from Dr Micheal Semon that the problem with fairness is that we all have different definitions of what is fair. I was in this resentment stage.
I have also learned to listen to my wife, Inna, and ask her for advice. I make my own choices but I respect her wisdom. On the day of the show I did not want to go. I asked Inna what I should do. She said, “Sunshine, put your suit on and go. Be nice and humble and act professional.” It was good advice.
I was standing in a booth looking at some boilers and met a very nice gentleman named Larry Hass. Larry asked me what I did and invited me to do a talk for a small group in the Hudson Valley. We exchanged contact information and three moths later I drove to Thornwood, New York and did a talk to about 20 plumbers and HVAC dealers.
I decided to join this group, which led to many other business relationships and revenue opportunities. If I were to diagram all of the relationships that meeting Larry led me to, it would literally look like an Amway network. This network of relationships can all be traced back to Larry Hass. But at a deeper level, it goes back to a choice that I made after listening to Inna. It looks like I made the right choice and it propelled me through the test and adversity.
Look around yourself and take responsibility for your place in life and understand that you made all the choices that propelled you to where you currently stand or sit. You may not have made ideal choices every time, but they were your choices.
The lesson that I learned from all of this was humility. It is a strange concept to the proud and therefore can seem like nonsense. Another lesson I had to learn, one that has truly given me freedom, was that I don’t owe and I don’t deserve, and I have responsibilities, not obligations. I can choose to receive from others freely without feeling obligated and I can choose to say “no” without feeling guilty because I do not owe what others want me to think that I owe.
So when you think about the promise, the problems and the provision, you must make the right choices when you face the problem. If you don’t, you will never get past the problem and it will return. The problem was put there to build your character. God cares about your character, not your comfort or your check book.
If you have any questions about this or anything else, please feel free to grab an appointment from my calendar and we can have a chat: